Monty needs the drive to recover

Former European No.1 tells Tom English where he must improve to make Ryder Cup squad

COLIN MONTGOMERIE had his happy face on at Gleneagles the other day. Not a frown or a glower to be seen, which was impressive given that the subject matter was largely the US Open and that on more than one occasion the O word was mentioned. O is for Oakmont, where Monty scowled his way to a second-round 82 in last year's tournament, rowing with his caddie, staring out the galleries and disappearing in a huff at the end.

Those of us who witnessed the 18 holes won't forget it, won't readily shake from the memory the vision of the Monty berater, beer in one hand and jumbo dog oozing relish in the other, giving flak to the Scot as he failed to see the funny side of yet another double-bogey.

"Smile, Colin!"

Harrumph

"Asshole!"

No sign of that Monty on Thursday, though. No, this was the engaging Monty, the honest broker with a neat line in self-deprecation. "Colin, aren't you worried that another US Open torture session will destroy the last vestiges of your confidence?"

"Oh, no," he smiles. "No, no. I can't get any less confident than I am, so that's fine."

At Gleneagles, Monty is hit with more questions about his Ryder Cup hopes. It's like asking the average man in the street how he likes his chances of bedding Heidi Klum. The odds are not dissimilar, after all. We poke away at Monty about Valhalla but his prospects of being there are remote. He's 102 in the world for God sake. He hasn't finished inside the top 40 in any tournament since January. He needs to contend, contend and contend again to haul himself into a position of strength. Right now, he doesn't have it. This is Monty talking. His game's not good enough, he says. Not nearly good enough.

Monty will chat away about the Ryder Cup all day but you don't get any sense from him that he expects to make the team. Not really. He'll chat away about this week's US Open at Torrey Pines near San Diego and you don't get much of a sense that he thinks he has a chance of doing anything there either. Not if you're listening properly.

Oh sure, he says he wouldn't be going there unless he thought he could win but then he follows that up with this. "There's not much in my game right now." He can't find enough fairways these days. He just can't do it. It's killing him. He misses fairways this week and he knows what's going to happen.

"Smile, Colin! Remember me?"

"The US Open last year was dramatically difficult. I mean, Oakmont. Bloody hell. Torrey Pines, apparently, is as difficult if not more difficult. It's playable, of course it is. If you have everything on song you can just about get round."

Monty has never been to Torrey Pines and it's questionable if he's been swotting up on it. All the talk over there is that this year's US Open is going to be a little different from Oakmont or the scene of the Scot's ultimate nightmare, W****d F**t, the year before.

Nobody is going to mistake it for the turkey shoot at the Bob Hope but it looks like Mike Davis, the USGA's senior director of rules and competitions, is going to cut the players some slack. Belittling them is not, it seems, top of his agenda as it was with Tom Meeks, the man he succeeded in 2006.

The phrase risk-and-reward has been mentioned. There is talk of flexibility in tee locations and hole yardages. The 18th, for instance, is a definite eagle opportunity. A grandstand finish is possible. The par-four 14th may be drivable on Sunday, the par-three 3rd will be no more than a wedge in two rounds. Monty says "par, bogey, par, stuttering home kind of golf" as typified by the US Open doesn't do a lot for him. It might not be as penal as all that this year.

How penal it is for Monty purely depends on how straight he hits it. "I haven't been hitting the fairways as regularly as I was; 12 out of 14 was average, normal. I just took that as read. Now it's gone down to eight. You miss four fairways a round and there's got to be a couple of bogeys in there. Well, there's eight shots a tournament and that's you from fifth to 40th. That's what's happening. That's exactly what it is. It adds up over four days. I've got to become the Monty of old if you like, when I was putting the ball on the fairway. That's why I scored.

"I've started to pick the bones out of it now. It was put in a vault before. 'I finished 10th? OK, I finished 10th'. Now I'm becoming more analytical, more statistic-based. Because when it's not going well you have to analyse these things and ask why is this not happening. I've just had a particularly bad run and I need to get it back again."

He says he's happy otherwise. Recently married, everything at home couldn't be better. He's kind of hoping that the good vibes domestically are going to feed through professionally some time soon, like in the next six or seven days would be nice. "You saw me in 2003 and 2004. I wasn't actually very happy was I? And the golf suffered and that's why I went down to 83rd in the world. The golf's suffering now because I haven't played well." Driving and fairways, he repeats. The big stick. He beats himself with it, you can tell.

So when he tees it up this week he won't be thinking Ryder Cup and, we're guessing, he won't be thinking victory either. He'll be thinking "get this bloody ball in play like you used to and take it from there". He'll be thinking Tiger, too. Hard not to.

Wednesday marked Tiger's first round of golf (he played Torrey Pines) since he had surgery (his third such op) on his troublesome knee. That was back in April. He used a cart on Wednesday. There's a suggestion that he's not 100% fit, that he's walking with a limp. He's won six times at Torrey Pines but can he win if he's on one leg?

"Oh God, yes. One-armed, one-legged, whatever it may be. He won't be on one leg, though. Believe me. He's delayed coming back for reasons. He wouldn't be competing in major championships if he wasn't 100% fit. He's a physical specimen the like we've never known in our sport. I'm sure his injured leg will be twice as good as my so-called fit one.

"Ah, there'll be reports, of course there will. Has anyone seen him limp? That'll be a press limp. He knows his way around the course. Knows the greens, is comfortable on the course. He's the hottest favourite. But the competition is good. Right behind, very, very good. Getting better all the time."

Monty wishes he could say the same thing about himself, but he can't. Ryder Cup? Let's keep it real here. A few more drives on flat ground will do for now.